Brazil, you say? They know how to play football over there, don't they? But it's a long way for one so middle aged as I to travel.

So instead, I shall slouch into my leather armchair and view the tournament from this side of the Atlantic. I shall try and watch every game and will definitely make wildly inaccurate predictions too.

I do solemnly vow to give you a real sense of what it's like to not be at the World Cup. This is the blog where all the colour and atmosphere and passion of watching the world's greatest sporting tournament on a wall mounted widescreen really comes to life.

Saturday, 21 June 2014

England 1-2 Uruguay

Woe is not me. Woe is a back header. Woe is two defenders pushing up, playing for offside. Woe is a deadly finisher sneaking in behind them, stumbling, yet still slamming the ball home. Woe is the joy of finally scoring your first World Cup goal, then feeling utter misery ten minutes later. Woe is your World Cup being over after it has barely begun. Actually, woe is me.