Brazil, you say? They know how to play football over there, don't they? But it's a long way for one so middle aged as I to travel.

So instead, I shall slouch into my leather armchair and view the tournament from this side of the Atlantic. I shall try and watch every game and will definitely make wildly inaccurate predictions too.

I do solemnly vow to give you a real sense of what it's like to not be at the World Cup. This is the blog where all the colour and atmosphere and passion of watching the world's greatest sporting tournament on a wall mounted widescreen really comes to life.

Monday 16 June 2014

France 3-0 Honduras

A warning to the other teams in this Group.

Honduras seem to be a team that's sent onto the pitch to Hound Your Ass.

The French certainly felt their bite, heels were snapped at and legs swiped from under them, the game ending with players having plenty of bones to pick with each other.

Yet class prevailed, Benzema striking twice to restore if not law, then a little bit of order to the game.

The goal line technology made an embarrassing appearance, declaring first NO GOAL then GOAL as the ball bounded along the line before being helped in by the Honduran keeper.